Alternative end of the season awards 2018-19

To no one’s surprise, Etienne Capoue has been named Watford’s Player of the Season. No argument from me there. But there are a few other players who are worthy of an award of one kind of another. So, without further ado...

The Keith Pritchett award for most under-rated player
There are a few candidates for this title, but I’m giving it to Kiko Femenía. Equally adept as a wing-back or an out-or-out winger, his pace keeps things tight on the right-side in our half and terrifies opposing defenders in theirs, and his delivery is reliable. I can’t recall a significant error from him all season, and he even scored a rare goal. I think we rather take his excellence for granted – he hasn’t even got his own chant.

The ‘Heidar on the wing?’ award for best performance in the wrong position
Let’s face it, Will Hughes isn’t a winger. In an ideal world, he’d be playing a Paul Scholes-type role, dropping in behind a lone striker or forming the tip of a midfield diamond. Indeed, the goals he scores are very Scholesish (Scholesian? Scholesesque?). Instead, Javi’s preferred formation has led to a season stuck out on the right wing, where Will has got on with the job admirably, ferreting for the ball, executing all manner of nifty passes and generally annoying the opposition. I hope he gets to play a more central role one day, though.

The Roger Joslyn award for sustained aggression
It was in a meaningless home game at the end of last season that I first noticed Etienne Capoue’s metamorphosis from haughty midfield general to snarling bite-yer-legs merchant, as he snapped into tackle after tackle with gusto. That’s continued this season, to the point where his total of 13 yellow cards is just one short of Jose Holebas’s record of 14 in a season – which, lest we forget, is also a Premier League record. Amid all the plaudits for the way Capoue and Doucouré have bossed the midfield all season, let’s not forget that it’s founded on Etienne’s newfound willingness to get stuck in.

The Etienne Capoue award for fading away
Remember when Capoue used to score a few spectacular goals in the opening month of the season, guaranteeing that pundits were still lauding him long after his performances had plateaued? This season it’s been Roberto Pereyra’s turn. He scored both goals in the opening-day win against Brighton, and by the end of October he had five. There was one more against Chelsea on Boxing Day; since then, nothing. He’s not just in the team as a goalscorer, of course, but in the second half of the season there have been periods, and even whole games, where he’s been all but invisible. There’s so much potential there, but we haven’t seen Bobby P at his bewitching best very often since the autumn.

The Troy Deeney award for being Troy Deeney
This has been an archetypal Troy Deeney season. We’ve had goals, we’ve had a controversial sending off, we’ve had his usual frankness (occasionally tipping over into foolishness) in front of the media, and of course we’ve had the drama of that last-minute penalty in the FA Cup semi-final. If he somehow manages to score the winning goal against Man City in the final, this will be the most Troy Deeney season ever.

The Richard Flash award for failing to live up to his name
This hasn’t exactly been a bad season for Isaac Success. He’s scored a few goals, and when given the chance to start, he usually executes the role he’s been given well enough. But his decision-making is woeful: he shoots when he should pass and passes when he should shoot. There’s a player there, as they say, but there’s also a risk that he’ll follow Stefano Okaka in the line of ‘potential successors to Troy who ended up just being brought on at the end of the game to rough up the opposing defenders’.

The Sietes man of mystery award
I’ve been excited about Adalberto Peñaranda ever since we signed him in early 2016. A Venezuelan prodigy who had apparently set the Under-20 World Cup alight, he was going to be our very own Messi. At first he stayed in Europe, on loan at Granada, then Udinese, then Malaga. Well, fair enough, we needed to get the lad acclimatised to European football. Then there were problems getting him a work permit to play in England. Then we got him one and he arrived in the autumn – and nothing happened. This mythical creature finally proved to be a real person (albeit with very strange hair) when he played against Woking in the FA Cup 3rd round. He looked... okay, perhaps a bit over-eager to impress, which is understandable in the circumstances. A substitute appearance against Newcastle in the next round came and went, and that was that (apart from a season-ending injury sustained in training). If he doesn’t start appearing in the first team squad early next season, I’m going to start thinking I just imagined the whole thing.